In the next chapter of our new book, Snap Strategies for Couples: 40 Fast Fixes for Everyday Relationship Pitfalls, Dr. Pepper and I warn about the too-easy pattern of lack of play. Here's a sample!
Couples who play together stay together. Every relationship needs play that is fresh and fun, activities that arouse friendly, frivolous feelings. Couples who play together, sharing laughter and spontaneity, are happier individually and as a couple than those who don’t. Fun together doesn’t happen just by chance often enough to keep you connected. Play dates or fun at home produce badly needed endorphins that keep us connected to one another. Be original and keep playing and laughing. Be intentional about creating time and energy to be playful with your partner.
Mammals play for solidarity, for joy, to show affection and trust. Play is hardwired in our DNA and we really can’t afford to ignore it. We were not meant to be serious all the time, and we need occasions to be silly, lively, athletic, creative, and funny. Trust is built through risk and so some of our play involves a certain amount of risk. For example, hiking or climbing together, taking a trip together (even if it’s just to a different neighborhood), playing bingo, jointly doing a video game, going to a nightclub — or even gambling — raises the excitement level in a relationship and often requires interdependence and communication. But above all, play gives you those great endorphins that provide pleasure. It casts a good mood over the two of you.
As always, for the other pages of the chapter and the rest of the book, order here!